Musical Disharmony

Last year, before satellite radio was even more than a glimmer in our minds, Dish Network picked up the Sirius music channels. When there was nothing else on television, we'd pop on the 60s channel instead, and at Christmastime I discovered they'd taken one of their regular channels (Easy Listening, I'm almost positive) and turned it into a holiday music channel. Now there were two, along with Dish's own Holiday Music Channel, each with a different playlist.

So now that I had satellite radio, I looked forward to having Christmas music when this time of the year rolled around.

I'm now really disappointed. This year the holiday channel is on Channel 2, StarTime or StarLight, whatever, and I think someone broke into their holiday music catalog and destroyed everything but about 36 hours of the same songs. Since Saturday (and I've only had the channel on for a total of about three hours) I've heard Bruce Springsteen yelling a Christmas song at least four times; I've also heard "The Christmas Song" by Nat King Cole upteen times and John Lennon's Christmas hit and many others too many times already. When they play Gene Autry, it is always "Here Comes Santa Claus." Perry Como is always "There's No Place Like Home for the Holidays." Etc. Plus they have really bad rock Christmas songs mixed in, like the Springsteen, and Macy Gray, who sounds like she's 100 years old with strep throat.

So I finally went back to the real radio and settled on 94.9. I have to listen to commercials, but anything's better than another Macy Gray rendition and yet another repeat of the last fifteen songs. My God, in my own personal collection I have at least three days worth of Christmas music, no two versions alike, and I don't have half of what's out there.

While tuning 94.9 back in I accidentally hit the preset for 104.whatever, and that terrible song "The Christmas Shoes" was on. For that I'd go back to Macy Gray. God, I despise that song. Oh, I loved the original story when it was a six paragraph story at the end of an article in Reader's Digest over 20 years ago; it was simple and touching and made you think. I didn't even mind the different embellished versions in those Chicken Soup for the Soul type books. But this wailing, lugibrious version of the tale is simply horrible.